50 Simple rules every cyclist should know

Out of the dark mist by John D Kelly

1. Own at least one really good pair of cycling shorts

2. Pump your tyres !

3. Know how to change a tube

4. Wash your bike

5. Wash your bike before bringing it to the bikeshop

6. Wash yourself

7. Wash your helmet and shoes

8. Don’t over lubricate your chain

9. Bring home your rubbish

10. Don’t fight with cars or trucks, there can be only 1 looser if it gets physical

11. Even if it doesn’t it will stress you out and ruin your spin

12. Check your tyres for glass

13. Know who won the most recent Grand tour and Classic

14. Never underestimate the guy in runners

15. If you shave your legs don’t leave hair behind your knees

16. Ladies shave all the way up, Old school men shave to just above the shorts line

17. Cycle no handed for 10 seconds on every spin

18. This builds the skill to take off or put on a rain cape whilst moving

19. Don’t be too quick to judge

20. Don’t be too quick to attack

21. But don’t miss the break either

22. Use energy gels sparingly

23. Know how many gears your bike has

24. Don’t judge a person with a Granny Ring

25. Never, ever wear anything under your shorts

26. Base layers go under the straps of your bib-shorts

27. Always put your chain on the outside sprocket when removing the rear wheel

28. Climbing hurts, get used to it

29. Don’t try to ‘save’ a gear for when it gets hard, use your gears and save your legs instead

30. If you eat regularly in McDonalds and own a ten grand lightweight bike there’s something very wrong someplace

31. Learn how to sprint

32. When cornering look where you want to go, not where you don’t

33. Disc brakes are better, end of story

34. To be able to ride a race or a sportive in the rain, you must train in the rain

35. It’s never as wet as it looks

36. Pointing the saddle down at the front does not make you feel like you are going downhill

37. If the sight of people with beards shaving their legs for aerodynamics confuses you, you are not alone.

38. Know at least one good Ras story

39. Tan lines are earned, not bought

40. If you wear trade team clothing, don’t mix and match

41. Mountain bikers wear peaks on their helmets. Road cyclists don’t

42. The only bike ride you’ll ever regret is the one that you did not do

43. Always help the new guy, we were all new once

44. Change your bar tape at least once per year

45. Strava KOM’s are not the equivalent of winning a race, or even finishing top 10

46. You won’t always be the fastest or the fittest but you can be the toughest

47. Learn to see the human side of the professional end of the sport

48. Everyone should see the Tour in the flesh at least once

49. Don’t take it personally if someone shouts at you when they are under pressure

50. Notice one new thing on every spin.

Barry

www.thecyclingblog.com

www.seankellycycling.com