50 Simple rules every cyclist should know

Out of the dark mist by John D Kelly

  1. Own at least one really good pair of cycling shorts

  2. Pump your tyres !

  3. Know how to change a tube

  4. Wash your bike

  5. Wash your bike before bringing it to the bikeshop

  6. Wash yourself

  7. Wash your helmet and shoes

  8. Don’t over lubricate your chain

  9. Bring home your rubbish

  10. Don’t fight with cars or trucks, there can be only 1 loser if it gets physical

  11. Even if it doesn’t it will stress you out and ruin your spin

  12. Check your tyres for glass

  13. Know who won the most recent Grand tour and Classic

  14. Never underestimate the guy in runners

  15. If you shave your legs don’t leave hair behind your knees

  16. Ladies shave all the way up, Old school men shave to just above the shorts line

  17. Cycle no handed for 10 seconds on every spin

  18. This builds the skill to take off or put on a rain cape whilst moving

  19. Don’t be too quick to judge

  20. Don’t be too quick to attack

  21. But don’t miss the break either

  22. Use energy gels sparingly

  23. Know how many gears your bike has

  24. Don’t judge a person with a Granny Ring

  25. Never, ever wear anything under your shorts

  26. Base layers go under the straps of your bib-shorts

  27. Always put your chain on the outside sprocket when removing the rear wheel

  28. Climbing hurts, get used to it

  29. Don’t try to ‘save’ a gear for when it gets hard, use your gears and save your legs instead

  30. If you eat regularly in McDonalds and own a ten grand lightweight bike there’s something very wrong someplace

  31. Learn how to sprint

  32. When cornering look where you want to go, not where you don’t

  33. Disc brakes are better, end of story

  34. To be able to ride a race or a sportive in the rain, you must train in the rain

  35. It’s never as wet as it looks

  36. Pointing the saddle down at the front does not make you feel like you are going downhill

  37. If the sight of people with beards shaving their legs for aerodynamics confuses you, you are not alone.

  38. Know at least one good Ras story

  39. Tan lines are earned, not bought

  40. If you wear trade team clothing, don’t mix and match

  41. Mountain bikers wear peaks on their helmets. Road cyclists don’t

  42. The only bike ride you’ll ever regret is the one that you did not do

  43. Always help the new guy, we were all new once

  44. Change your bar tape at least once per year

  45. Strava KOM’s are not the equivalent of winning a race, or even finishing top 10

  46. You won’t always be the fastest or the fittest but you can be the toughest

  47. Learn to see the human side of the professional end of the sport

  48. Everyone should see the Tour in the flesh at least once

  49. Don’t take it personally if someone shouts at you when they are under pressure

  50. Notice one new thing on every spin.





4 thoughts on “50 Simple rules every cyclist should know

  • July 31, 2015 at 1:13 pm

    Seems reasonable. Can I add one more…?

    51. Don’t turn up for a ride and THEN start carrying out repairs/making bike adjustments.

  • July 31, 2015 at 3:13 pm

    52. If you talk the talk you gotta walk the walk

    (I had a friend of a friend give a lengthy monologue on the pros & cons of Speedplay vs Look pedals, amongst many other things he had clear opinions on, before being dropped like a stone as soon as our first climb hit just 3%)

  • February 28, 2017 at 11:35 pm

    No. 50 think that should be a bit further up then 50! ” Notice one new thing on every spin’


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